Beaten About the Head and Shoulders With the Big Stick of the Universe

Up til now it's been a well-kept secret, of course, but I don't much like my job. (tee hee) In fact, the atmosphere and the pressure to sell and upsell here make the previous job in Denver (internet tech support as opposed to this 'billing agent' stuff) seem like summer vacation. Also -- well, it helped that most of the supervisors in Denver didn't even bother to pretend they were buying into the various lines of corporate baloney. When we came across someone (usually someone new) who did, everyone would say they 'drank the kool-aid,' a reference to Jim Jones and his poor doomed followers. In Concord, they're all dancing in lockstep and NO ONE so much as whispers in dissent. I like sheep and everything, but prefer them with wool.

But -- it's a job and it seems jobs are not all that easy to find here. It pays pretty well. It provides insurance. I have high blood pressure and diabetes, and once in awhile I like to go see a dentist, so I need insurance. Of course, eventually we're going to come cheek to jowl with the fact that I simply am not ever going to be a salesperson and they're going to pack me up and show me the door, I feel pretty sure of that. If someone calls in and says they want cable tv or they want internet or even (may the gods help them) they want digital phone, I'll enter the order for them, but every time I think about saying, "Here's what I'm gonna do for you! I'm going to wrap all your services together in our bundle offer and we'll give you five premium channels on your new digital cable service, 6 megs of high speed internet and we'll transfer your phone from -- did you say AT&T? -- and we'll give you all that in one bill for $159.95 for twelve months! Would you like a weekday or weekend appointment for install?" -- my throat just closes up.

Because the rest of the day I'm hearing, "I got my bill and why do I owe you guys $357?" or, "This isn't what they told me I was getting!" or, "Your tech has been out here five times and this phone STILL doesn't work and now I have to call you from my cousin's house!" And many variations on the theme. Over and over I hear people who have been sold stuff they clearly can't afford or signed up for something they don't understand or need and I know, this is a business, the bottom line is money, but I just don't like it. I don't mind supporting the internet service and I don't even mind accepting payments but trying to explain and justify bills is hard, and selling stuff to people I suspect are going to have grief over it -- I hate that.

Monday night I got an angry call from a man in Petaluma, a man about my age (well, he was David's age, actually) who had retired and bought a house with his daughter and grandkids, He was angry because they had come home one day to find a doortag saying there was egress from his lines and he could 'bring down a plane.' So they had to tear everything up and rewire, made a general mess and caused him headaches. But in return they promised him 'such a great deal' on his service that he'd be happy. The great deal turned out to be for six months. I got to tell him that, because it was over. He then roared for a long time about how nasty and controlling and unethical the company is (he had lots of examples, and every single one made me wince) and how the kids weren't going to like it, but he was taking out the cable and they were going to read books. Actually, I think that's an excellent idea.

Tuesday night I got a call from a very nice mellow man in his late 40's. He and his wife had been out of the country for six months and had rented out their house, but now they were back and were thinking about adding our phone service. So we talked about it and I told him only the good things and I thought I had a sale there (and I certainly could have used one) but he said he wanted to discuss it with his wife and he asked for my extension because he wanted to set it up through me if they decided to take it. Okay, cool. So just before the end of shift another agent transfers this man (his name was Patrick) back to me. Patrick was still very mellow and pleasant and he said he just didn't want to leave me hanging, but they'd decided they didn't need this service. In fact, they'd decided to disconnect their cable tv, too, because their time away had changed them and they had brought back an awful lot of books and they wanted to read them. So I asked where they had been. India. They had meant to simply travel around, but the wife had gotten ill and they had taken a friend up on an offer to stay in a little empty house in an ashram for two months while she recovered. He talked about the community and about what they leanred while living there, how they had learned to meditate and to go within themselves and find out things they never suspected, and how inexpensive books had been, and how they had a whole little library now of wisdom and they realized that they were happier when they were living more simply.

I told David about these two calls and about how it felt like I was being nudged pretty strongly to move on out of there, because I agree with both of those men -- we DO sometimes manipulate and even misrepresent to score sales (I hear it around me all day), and really, more time in study and meditation, less dependence on media .... (Doesn't mean I didn't like The Tudors.)

Wednesday morning I was an hour late to work. I dunno. I was doing all my usual morning stuff and feeling very organized because it was all getting done and I got into the car and started down the hill and glanced at the clock. It said 12:09. And I thought, OMG, I was supposed to BE there by 12:00! And you know, there's no way you can drive fast enough to make that up. So I was written up. If that happens a few more times, I'll be escorted out. But of course I DON'T subconsciously want to be fired ... and collect unemployment ... and find a nice job in a bookstore ....