On the Brink of the Fantasy

Or one of them.

Today we had our second day of lab for the Virtual Customer Account Executive program (also known as Virtual CAE, because the world is made of alphabet soup these days) and at the end of it they assigned us our computers and routers (we already have had new cable connections installed at home and modems hooked up, and last week were given our brand spanking new insanely cool ergo chairs to bring home). They sent us on home to hook everything up, with instructions to timestamp at whatever the end of our normal shifts would be, and come back tomorrow for just a bit more training and lunch and then the whole call center closes at 3 for the Holiday Party, which I am not going to attend. Another issue entirely.

This was at 4, my shift runs til 7. So I headed out cheerfully into rush hour traffic with what was left of my Starbucks Venti Five-Shot Sugar-free Gingerbread Latte, No Whipped Cream, and half of David's salmon sandwich from yesterday which was my late-day snack for today and my iPod (which is currently reading The Subtle Knife to me -- I read it myself a year ago but I do so like to listen to stories while I drive). It took a little more than an hour to get home, what with traffic at the tunnel and so forth, and I arrived just after sunset, reminding myself merrily that tomorrow is the shortest day of the year and it's just going to get better from here. (Well, until June 21, when it starts to get worse again, if you're a person who doesn't like the dark. I kinda like the dark except to drive in. Much like snow.)

It took three trips to unload the car and then schlep all the computer parts upstairs, and about 45 minutes to get it unpacked and set up, cables all over the place, but all the little lights came on as they should. Happy happy! Then it spent another half hour or so busiiy loading all its special Comcast CAE software while I played with my Magnetic Poetry stuff. At last it was ready, and I went to log in. It would not let me in. I tried twice, carefully, knowing that if there's a third fail it will lock me out for two hours, and then I called IT support. I explained my problem and stressed that I was in a Virtual CAE pilot program and there was no one else here to help. The guy changed my password. That didn't work, either. So then --- get this --- the company's IT dude, after confirming my username which is used to log me INTO THE COMPUTER ITSELF, says, "Well, what part of the program can't you access?"

"All of it," I reply, puzzled.

"Just click on Internet Explorer." (WHAT???)

"I can't. This is the main log-in screen. You know, the solid blue one."

"Just because you can't log into Comcast doesn't mean you haven't got internet access. Let's see what else you can get to. Just click on the Internet Explorer icon."

"There is no Internet Explorer icon."

"The little blue E."

"There is no little blue E. I can't log into the computer."

"If you click on your little green START button --"

"Um, I did HSI support for seven years and I know about the little green START button and also the little blue E, but I haven't got them and I haven't got a grassy field, either, because I can't log in to the computer. I'm talking about what we call my NT log-on. It isn't working."

"Well, I don't know what else to do, I already verified your username and changed your password. I can't log in to your computer remotely to see what you're seeing."

"Yeah, I'd need to be logged in for you to do that."

"I could write up a ticket."

(You do that, sweetheart.)

So I sigh and try again: "You know, on this first screen, where we log in, the solid blue screen with the little box in the center? There are three fields. We have Username, and we know that's right. We have Password, and since you just changed that we know that's right. Then we have Domain. Maybe the problem is Domain, it has a little drop-down. It's defaulted to VCAE321, which is me, and it says 'This computer,' which certainly sounds right. But I wonder if I need to use the domain we use at the call center?"

"CABLE," the lad says helpfully, but I've already tried it and it worked. I don't know why, it shouldn't, but I try not to argue with success. I tell the nice dull boy thank you and good-bye.

I install the soft phone and log in to it and then log-out to get the timestamp, only 17 minutes late. and install the IM program. Then I try to open the main database and discover that most of it has not been configured on the new computer, so there's another call to IT (another guy) who does write up a ticket and assure me that the computer has to go back to the call center with me tomorrow for all the tweaks it needs.

Bit of a rocky start and I WILL have to go into Concord both Christmas Day and New Year's (makes me cranky but there it is). But! Soon I will be working four days a week (every day but Tuesdays, when we have to have our meetings) in a really nice room surrounded by all my yarn and art stuff and even accompanied by my own dear little laptop, whereon I can check email and surf the Internet and do all those swell wonderful exciting things!