Making Head Room

Things I no longer need to know and/or lose sleep over:

SPA 22 (8495)
SPA 21 (8770)
and what does SPA mean?
what area codes fit in what SPA (i.e., 415, 510, 925, 707 and 831 fit in SPA 21, which is accounts beginning with 8770)
what a DTA is and why
what's the difference between analog and digital?
how to explain pro-rated bills, especially to people for whom English is not exactly their first (or second, for that matter) language
digital cable packaging
how to set up a home network
how to use all the phone features
how to tell if your modem is working and what to do if it isn't
how to keep your kids from ordering porn (probably -- some kids are really slick)
what promo is available to whom
why *we* give all our good promos to new customers instead of doing nice things for people who have been with us since the invention of the wheel
where (channel-wise) to find the Giants' game on any given night
where (channel-wise) to find the Oakland A's' game on any given night
what's going on with the NFL negotiations and why don't *we* carry it anymore?
all 93 (I'm not kidding, I counted) marks that must be hit on any given call
how to read the freaking bill (I can do it now but it took me well over a year to feel competent at it)
how to decode the company alphabet soup: HSI, CHSI, VOD, CDV, DCT, DVR, HDDVR, SDDVR, TPO, TPV, CPNI, TN, B1, B2, EDP, SPP, TCF, and a host of others, and especially the PGL components, such as ACW, AHT, and most horrid of all, USR
The FCC digital thingy vs. Cavalry (the Comcast digital thingy)
about 6287 transfer numbers
multiple personal log-ins, usernames, and passwords that change every six weeks or so
node
trap
tap
and other extremely cool *in* words
cable cards and why (never did get the hang of that one)
ins and outs of bizarre and sinister ordering system
HOW EVERYTHING WORKS

That last one contains all sort of processes, some of which I had down pat and some of which I had to ask for help on, more than once.

I don't need them anymore. Not any of it, and now I can clear out great expanses of my mind for things like creating and writing and yoga and meditation and cooking and British history and -- French. :o) We're calling it Early Retirement, another name for *I've had all I can stands and I can't stands no more - I quit!"

Bye-bye, Comcast!

And thank you, David, for covering my bases! I love you!